Feelings of Inadequacy

Television. Internet. Magazines. Billboards.

They are covered with perfect individuals, illustrating what the world has been programmed to think is "attractive." Women wearing minimal clothing, shirtless men sporting their muscles, people with flawless skin, perfect body weight, gorgeous hair, ect. These people are edited, placed on billboards and instantly they set a standard of living.

In relationships this can cause a major problem. Thankfully, Brian is so good about guarding his eyes. When a commercial comes on that is inappropriate, he turns away, refusing to look at such things. It has been fantastic for me because I don't feel like I have to compete with these women models who are perfect in every way. He doesn't look at that, so I don't feel like I have to meet such standards. If he did, I would feel so inadequate and like no matter what I did, I would never be satisfying and good enough for him. What an awful feeling that would be!!!

I will be honest and say that a couple years ago, I was not careful with what I allowed myself to watch, read, listen to, ect. Thank goodness the Lord has really been working on me and showing me how these things affect my life and walk with God. I'm so happy that the Lord has changed that area of my life to where I feel disgusted with TV, Internet and the like. Also, I believe that it has really benefited Bri and my relationship because he won't feel like he has to compete. I love everything about him, no matter what the dudes on TV are doing. He's perfect for me and I want to continue to work at making sure he knows that I don't have a standard for him to meet. If I'm posting pictures and fantasizing about some movie or pop star, then he will feel like he isn't enough. I do NOT want the love of my life to feel that way, and I definitely don't ever want to allow myself to think that way.

We all know that the focus on sex is so powerful in today's world. We can't get away from it and sadly it will only get worse as time goes on. We can't change what type of images are portrayed in our world, but we CAN change what we do with them. The devil wants us to look to other sources for satisfaction, but that will only frustrate us because that will never satisfy. The Lord created a relationship to be between two people...ONLY! If there are other characters polluting your mind and making you look at your partner differently, then there is a problem. You may not be intimate with them, but your mind has been. What makes one more acceptable than the other? The Bible says, "Don't you see that whatever enters the mouth goes into the stomach and then out of the body? But the things that come out of a person's mouth come from the heart, and these defile them." Matthew 5:18. Also it says in Psalm 44:21 "Would not God discover this? For He knows the secrets of the heart."

To all my fellow bros out there, I just want to encourage you to not ever compromise with what you let you eyes see. So many times, I ask my friends their opinion on a movie as far as cleanliness and sex goes and they inform me it was clean and "they don't really show anything" . . . then I go see the movie and I have to look down for 3/4 of the movie cause an immodest girl is in the whole stinkin movie. Don't ever lower your standards of what is right and pure. Pretty much, I'm reiterating what Becca said; be careful what you let your eyes see and your ears hear. Be faithful to your partner, even with your eyes.

Bottom line: We would just like to encourage everyone, along with ourselves, to guard our hearts. Be careful with what we allow ourselves to look at and dwell on. This not only affects our relationship with Christ, but also it can really affect our dating/marriage relationship.